The Magic Refrigerator

I am feeling better today. Now that it's almost 2 p.m. and my insomnia from last night has been more or less counterbalanced with a nap.  If you have an idealized image of me, do not read the rest of this paragraph. Just skip the next one and the world will not change. I also woke up with really bad nausea which got worse when I was upright.  Maybe it was just from nasal drainage? Nope. It was from nasal not-drainage. I had a head full of snot and it was fucking with my equilibrium and creating the desire to vomit my empty guts out.  Then the thought of vomiting made me sicker and you get the idea.  My roommate- who is not in the least intimidated by my strong personality because she has one too- told me to stop being stubborn and do a salt sniff.  That's where you get some salt water and put it in your palm, then snort it up your nose and tip your head back. Anything up there comes out. Then you repeat on the other side.  Gross. Really, really gross. Better out than in. And it made me throw up too. But damn, I felt better almost immediately.

I felt well enough to eat something.  My fridge has a week-old squash, some cauliflower, some hummus, stray blueberries, orange juice and a bottle of white wine that's been in there for 3 weeks. Pretty sure that one or more of those things are bad. So I grabbed the hummus and closed the door. Looked at the magnets and doodads that sit on the outside and mused about how much you can tell about a person from their refrigerator door.

I think most of it you would expect- magnets from Washington and a "Hate Free Zone" denote the liberal hippie that lives here. There is one that says "If you must smoke, smoke salmon" which I got in 2006 on a trip to the Pike Place Market. The Kokopelli was from Santa Fe. I've never ordered from Hideaway Pizza but I do like their food. I think that one was left by the previous tenents.  Holding up a picture I took of my grandparents in 2005 at their home is a woman with her hand to her head. It says "Oh Crap! I forgot to get married and have some kids!" I love that one. My newest magnets are in the bottom in the middle- "Ain't no nookie like Chinookie" and "There's no ho like Coho!", both which feature pictures of salmon. I love that these are spread haphazardly along the fridge and in no real order.  That's a good metaphor for my life.

One would expect the OU Library magnet and the one from the Oklahoma City Museum of Art. In fact, all of these magnets would be expected for my house.  And then there's that one in the middle. That one with the blue teddy bear, flowers in her paw, a bow by her ear and a heart painted on her chest.  Obviously hand painted. It's my favorite.  My sister Mickie painted it for me years ago, probably in the late 1990's when I lived in Las Vegas.  At least that's what I remember. I have taken it with me wherever I move.

I know that in our small human brains, we tend to judge people. I would prefer to be judged by my bookshelves, filled with Alexie, Coetzee and a myriad of writers from Ireland, South America, Western Europe and the United States.  I am not that well read but I do know how to read. That's what my bookshelves say about me as long as you ignore the occasional pulp fiction. Since those are in storage until I have the energy to paint the office and that can't be done until I get rid of the fucking cockroaches still camping out in the kitchen, I'll settle for assessment by fridge.

Man, I gotta stop taking that cough syrup with codeine in it...